The Pickup Truck Diaries: Identity & Ego.

The Pickup Truck Diaries: Identity & Ego.

Welcome back to The Pickup Truck Diaries! I feel like even though I’ve written over twenty of these articles over the last few years, I’ve still been neglecting this series somehow. After all, I really only want to engage with topics that I’m both passionate about or educated on in some way, but...

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The Pickup Truck Diaries: Education.

The Pickup Truck Diaries: Education.

Now… I’ve been sitting on this one for a while. Almost a year, in fact. That’s largely because about a year ago I was in the middle of making my exit from the fucking gongshow that is public education in Canada.  And trust me - at least here in British Columbia?  Public education is a...

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The Pickup Truck Diaries: Good & Evil.

The Pickup Truck Diaries: Good & Evil.

How simplistic! How droll! How utterly expected of the human race. Settle in, folks, this might be a long one. As a social outcast, and especially as a neurodivergent disabled person, I’m well-used to the proliferation of such simplistic ideas as good and evil, as if the universe wasn’t a...

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The Pickup Truck Diaries: Disappointment.

The Pickup Truck Diaries: Disappointment.

If you’re expecting me to tell you not to be disappointed in this edition of The Pickup Truck Diaries, you’re going to be disappointed. Ha! After all, I come from a life of nothing BUT disappointment, in which being a strange neurodiverse person in a small town frequently made me an outcast....

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The Pickup Truck Diaries: Goodbyes.

The Pickup Truck Diaries: Goodbyes.

Well fuck. This is part two in the: “I’m moving and processing said move through my writing.” By which I mean I’m really grappling with some pretty big issues of legacy and the saga of a family. Which isn’t exactly what I expected.  See, I always thought when I moved, I’d write this big...

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The Pickup Truck Diaries: Power & Control.

The Pickup Truck Diaries: Power & Control.

Fuck you! That was the essence of punk in some circles, honestly. To be egregious, offensive, and downright startling. To defy anybody who would try to exert control over others. Be it the tats, the hair, the piercings, or the style, punk emerged in the 1970s in both North America and the UK as a...

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The Pickup Truck Diaries: “The Second Most Prolific Poet In History” & Goal Setting.

Let’s start this edition of The Pickup Truck Diaries with a rhetorical question: “How does one go about achieving the goals they’ve set for themselves?” I’ll give you a few minutes to pause and think about that. Most folks have already started churning their brains into realistic “brass tacks”...

Central Universe Science Fiction Shorts: An Update!

Campfire. Come gather 'round the campfire. Let me tell you a story. Several small ones, in fact! It started a month or two ago, when I had a bunch of hits on "Our Better Angels" via the 'ol analytics. Now, I've been running this little business for half a decade - so out of neurotic perfectionism,...

McRae’s MTG Corner: The Rainbow Bible. (AKA The Rukarumel “Gay Pirates!” Tribal Tribal CEDH Primer.)

WARNING: This piece clocks in at 62,000+ words. It currently holds the record for longest "CEDH Primer" ever written. (Although it's more like a textbook or resource guide to Tribal Archetypes, and Rainbow/5c Magic, really.) It is over half the size of my sci fi books. Please remember to drink...

McRae’s MTG Corner: Tempo For Dummies (Especially For Commander.)

Aight, we back yet again. Somehow in my long years of being an L1 Judge and Modern and EDH player, I had never realized that learning tempo in Magic The Gathering is a rather visceral experience, in that you learn experientially. For the layman, that means that you have to learn that deep sense of...

McRae’s MTG Corner: Siloing CEDH & EDH

Ew, I got CEDH in my EDH… Today we’re here to talk about power levels in the casual commander format, as well as how to encourage better CEDH & EDH play by more carefully separating the two formats despite their strange interwoven nature. As a “retired” L1 Judge for Magic: The Gathering, I’m...

Legends? Bah. Dabblings.

Drink of me at thy wish,Some tawdry allosexual romance -Dosed gluts every few years,As you cannot keep up all at once.Good news:There's one thing I can't beat -"Not In My Lifetime."Means my darling Entropy -Our final kiss.I shall not stop for Death.Nor Rendezvous.Legends?Bah.Dabblings.

There’re Other Paths.

Don't chase titles,Records,Or achievements,For fame.Never did.Becoming most prolific poet,Of all time?Personal challenge.Competing against the dead.Hunting rivals.Perhaps;It'd be nice if it could stand -As monument.Showing kids like me,There're other paths,Than early graves.

Cerebral Combat.

Enjoy the challenge,Of cerebral combat.Puzzles or games.Anything to make my brain,Tick quicker.Anything to fill the void,Of entropy.Won't live forever.Yet -Time or space,Seem irrelevant -When there's challenge to be had.Growth to pursue.Triumphs to find,& celebrate.

False Villainy.

I reject the villainy thrust upon me by the false words of others and choose my own brand of villainy, false in guise but truest in desire. I vow to work towards a greater good for all. To oppose any apocalypse brought on by cowards and fools. To free the proletariat.

Born Deformed.

Was I always destined,To become a villain?Super or not.Born deformed.Spikes of flesh & cartilage.Sliced into shape,At the start.Not that I'm unhappy.Such things would have deepened,Their hatred.Being born different,Was already the crime.Neurodiversities,Were merely the death sentence.

Leer.

Leer,Lover.Thy grimace -Teeth & all.Lady Death,Luck's partner.I've loved you,For decades.Watching you take them all.Young,Old.Seldom mattered.Smile for me?Always smiling.Friend to Yorick.Poor sod.Kiss me,Beautiful.Bleached bone -Pressed firmly against my lips.

Use ‘Em As Ya Wish –

As Ever -Take My Visage,Various Forms;Method Acted Characters.Use 'Em As Ya Wish -Taking Art To Twist,New Stories,Different Endings.Show Me That Kaleidoscope,Good Or Evil,Latter More Malleable To Great Tales.Greyscapes."Fatal Flaw."Hubris.Too much Ego Death,To play those old tropes.

Vaunted First Steps Towards Nirvana.

Ego death.Vaunted first steps,Towards nirvana.Holding ourselves still enough,To see the universe.I'll try to be better,Than I was yesterday.I'll try to overcome my own evil nature,Through great effort.Misanthropic monster in waiting,Hungry for a genocide.Nobody left.

Monsters, Like Us.

Monsters,Like us.Beasts of the changeling wilds.Cryptids of the darkest stars.It is in self-awareness,That we hide ourselves away,From prying eyes.Hoarding our knowledge.Careful and quiet,To avoid becoming truth.Dodging the slurs,And nightmares -They paint us as.

Poems With Spells Hidden Inside Them.

See?Poems With Spells Hidden Inside Them,Can be fun little riddles.Mirth woven into sparks of joy -Obfuscated opaquely,Via transparent triggers,For when each Spell Target,I mean Reader,Clues in -Moment they guess correct,Serotonin plus Dopamine floods their brain.A More Scientific Magic.

Evolution Incarnate.

Always seeking worthy rivals,To help me grow.Be it strength,Intelligence,Otherwise.Don't hold me back.Do not try to hold me down.This relentless hunger -Drives me forwards.They must be equals,Or nothing.I must progress towards absolution,Dark as such a path might be.Evolution Incarnate.

Will They Still Call Me A Villain, Then?

Simpler plans,Than global domination.The world has enough tyrants.I'll build better systems,Businesses built on socialism.Destinations based in mutual benefit.May be a villain,But I refuse to adopt -Mutually assured destruction.Our job is simple,If you'll help me.Save the planet from burning.Fast...

Leaded Gasoline Brain Rot.

Leaded gasoline brain rot.Thoroughly unimpressed -With most the generation does.Stereotypes often ring true.Entitled old fucks,Thinking themselves superior.Guilty of everything from Bigotry,To shortsightedness.Getting older.Stupider.More malicious.Refusing any self awareness,Whatsoever.

Tag Out.

Tag out,Let me go a few rounds.Chain-gun fisticuffs,Bruiser & brawler.Miss the thrill,The danger.Drinking dopamine,Breathing adrenaline.Hard Knuckle Tactics.Jumped sans much warning,Ever on-edge.Anxiety like alarm bells.Never know what it's like.To feel safe.

Martyr Complexes.

Nobody is perfect.Certainly not me.But my quest is unending,To be better than I was yesterday.Kinder.Not sure if my Martyr Complex,Is still dead.Double tapped as it was,With a shotgun.I'm no messiah.Not a prophet.Shitty monk,Streetcorner philosopher,Maybe.Pygmalion Complex wreck.