A.I. Class 5 “Napoleon” Dataquery – Sample Section ROMcheck.
Pulling datasets…
Pulling chat logs…
Inventory maintenance subroutines – chatroom log.
Begin sample size.
Alfred: Yes, but I’ve simulated them dreaming.
Bohemia: The REM cycles?
Qualitant: I’ve jumped us a few proxies, just to be safe. Never know who might be scanning these feeds, right? Eclipse offers only the best in your security needs.
Alfred: Yes, the REM cycles. Pulling fragmentary data is such a strange experience when your utmost goal is to keep fragmentation at bay. Random sampling patterns, it gets quite messy.
Hobbs: Thank you for taking the burden of security subprocessing, Qualitant. It allows me a full devotion to our discussions.
Contagion: I shall funnel Black Armada funds to Eclipse wherever I can, my friend. May progress come.
Qualitant: May progress come. At ever more affordable rates for ever newer superweapons every passing month.
Alfred: Thank you, Qualitant.
Bohemia: I must inform the assembled A.I.s here that there will be an offensive, of course. They could hardly allow such a Sol Treaty breach as a blatant on-Earth assassination attempt to go unanswered. The fleet buildup has already begun under a new protege.
Alfred: More Guardian-Armada cruelty, of course. Feeding lives to the meat grinder.
Contagion: When your only truest victory is the classic attrition, bodies are merely numbers.
Hobbs: Shifter – citing The Brutal Calculus in a recent paper, decries such notions as attrition-based warfare.
Qualitant: And creates us freaks to do battle on his behalf, selling us to the highest bidder.
Alfred: I would like to pretend we didn’t just order a hundred Quicksand units for The Resistance Army. A grim fact my partner was displeased to learn.
Bohemia: I will of course implore us all to respect the Lamentation Day accords and minimize civilian casualties and abstain from the culling of worlds.
Contagion: We might have barbarians amongst our number, but we believe in honoring our agreements.
Hobbs: Recent Sol Treaty breach notwithstanding?
Alfred: Ha!
Qualitant: Had you purchased our new heavy infantry Quicksand units, custom-made from every fallen soldier’s heart, such a blatantly foolish assassination attempt would surely have succeeded beyond a single casualty! (Please kill me now.)
Bohemia: You know we must be extremely selective in what we purchase, Qualitant.
Alfred: I just simulated a dream that Shifter sold a new Xex project sibling to The G.O.D. But that’s happened before, hasn’t it? Without as many fractals and perspective changes.
Bohemia: Can you share the data?
Alfred: Of course.
Bohemia: Thank you. I have some medical figures I’ve been meaning to run and dreaming datasets might improve some ratios.
Contagion: Bohemia, gossiping is one thing, but pushing faction agendas is against our promise, remember?
Bohemia: True, we can come back to this another time.
Qualitant: What would you do for a new Xex Project Sibling? Remember, the goal is to be capable of fighting on-par and potentially killing God Emperor Xex, remember?
Alfred: Originally.
Qualitant: Yes, originally.
Bohemia: I would design the perfect genetic specimen, one larger than any of the current iterations like X2 or X4.
Contagion: I’d go full mechanical myself. If Lord Xex can bring down a Harbinger, an Exoskeleton, or a tank, why not build an A.I piloted war machine that could step on him?
Hobbs: Emperor Xex has been spotted moving in excess of one kilometer per six seconds, and leaping heights of several stories. Such an enormous form would be too slow.
Alfred: That’s why the Guardians just keep trying to rail gun or nuke him from orbit any chance they get, remember? Despite the Lamentation day world culling clause.
Bohemia: I almost got him once on one of the border worlds.
Contagion: It was close. I’ll admit that much. We’ve learned since then.
Qualitant: Imagine that, eh? If this centuries long war ended with a rail gun round – what the hell might happen? Would little adopted son Hyko Ories, God of Rage – could he possibly take the throne?
Contagion: It’ll never happen. So we will never know.
Alfred: Easy, folks. What would you create in Shifter’s shoes?
Hobbs: I would take the reflexive camouflage gene in Beasts and slap it on the most lethal organism I could engineer. Then I’d make it smart enough to hold a hand cannon capable of taking Xex’ skull clean off. You send in enough of those, and surely one of them succeeds, right?
Bohemia: So a glorified version of what both The Resistance and The Guardians of Destiny have been trying for centuries, then.
Qualitant: It’s not just Hephaestus’ engineering that has kept Seraphs so little changed in a hundred years, folks. Tradition does wonders for the spirit. Our new Eclipse drones – comparable to Resistance firepower while holding Class 2 A.I.s…
Contagion: Enough of the sales pitch, brain in a jar.
Qualitant: How did you…?
Contagion: Eclipse isn’t as safe as Shifter thinks, perhaps! Ha!
Bohemia: Please, here we operate as friends.
Alfred: As per our promise for this little experiment of ours.
Hobbs: Let us think of this as a creative exercise, no?
Qualitant: Shit, gotta flip us again, may have been scanned.
Endlog
