Deny me my Humanity,No longer.I've performed legal rituals:Appropriating law as I need it -To discard my birth names.Dead names that haunt me still,As if afraid they might surface.Tradition,Myth,Or Legend,Is usually about Fae like me -Stealing your intangibles,Names,Memories,Worse.
People exert all sorts of pressure on me,Void.Hanging suspended,Flailing in space.Must consider all applications,As they stand.Rather…floatIn such situations,Ensuring approximate acceleration,Velocity,& vectors.Considered you thousands of times -Dearest Void.Allow me decades more.
Sleeping To Sounds Of Thunderstorms.Memories of Wind Valley Howlers -Winter Storms so sharp & biting,All was black ice -Wind howling -Banshees at our windows.Love thunder.Adored the frequent sound;Rain Curtains,At night.Marking my life like omens,Green skies,To literal sheets of water.
Coven Rules,Are Consensus.Circle Protocol Discussions -For long as it takes community,To compromise.Matriarch,Matron,No want of frivolous inefficiency,Or hierarchy.Role for all little witches,All places & types;Just an Old Lady -Gentle Support.Like my Baba,Great Grandmother was,Mine.
There can be no rest,For us wicked.When else would we plot?Soliloquy Poetry,In pitch black darkness.Red Light Monologues,Of Sordid Youth -As many possess.Reformed;As best I could from Evil,Fight for Humanist Utopia now.Impossible dreams.Penance.Let me use my dark pasts,As simple jests.
Fight Me, Void.This Specific Witching Hour;I'm Discontent.Mumbling Hexes & Murmuring Curses,Under breath.Radiating auras of discomfort -The Uncanny Valley,In Exponentials.Hair follicles spiking -Cold sweat.Fever.Horror Movie Hungers.Snatching at fabrics.Moist dissections of Reality.Old habit...
Been three for three -Spotting,Other undiagnosed neurodivergence.Love mapping similarities,Across pattern recognitions -Admiring those:(With as many comorbidities as myself.)Different -Genetic Lottery.Born deformed,Missing half-eartip…But savant shit been nice,Against the disabilities.
Desperation Days.Death hounding us as she always does.An incorrigible lover,Demanding 100% of our time,Forevermore.Cash'd help -But we remain starving artists,Bound to our morals, values, & principles,Eschewing Capitalism.Rotting teeth.Decaying bodies.Sans the pennies to fix it all..][
Hex Inversions Of Pattern Recognition:Little Witches,Shall we play at games of wits?I love the clever!Trying our best,See people,Not playthings,Like horrid evil kin.Data & Observation,Pattern Recognition Symphonies,Future Sight,Without A Single Drop Of Mana,Or Magic.The Hex Is A Facade.
Tonight's Midnight Black Weaving -Comes as risk,Much as reward.Read further?My mnemonic will spread,Dancing in the glossy gleam of thy eyes.Yet such Curses,Can also play at blessings.Curse Of Great Suffering,Sealed here in scrawled language:"Through Suffering,Comes Our Greatest Strength."
Dye it black,As Stones demanded.Major Depression;Hanging Upon Our Shoulders,Like Atlas Or Sisyphus.Some know my true facsimile -In Talos.Unlike others,Always been at peace with oblivion itself.Ready for annihilation,Every second of every day.Carrying mass;Of stars & black holes.
Supervillain Plans To Save The World.Dry retching at this sudden cost,Of defeating almost every hero.Suddenly it's responsibility!"Noblesse Oblige."What horrid fate for the Evil!Who wanted to conquer my universe -Yet forced to squat on one floating rock.Helping others dodge Darwin Awards…
Bear?Femboy?Keep your silly titles.My painted black nails,& shaved body,Aren't sex objects to gawk at.My Non Binary Identity -Is the realm of cryptids from beyond time.Infinite Void.Thousand terrifying things;Skittering in the dark.My identity is not your fantasy.Nor should it be.
Goodnight Void.Tonight,In these minutes past midnight -Take me slowly.Quell failed attempts,At triggering lucid dreaming,With blessed black dreamlessness.Blink & Then Morning.Or give me a beautiful femme -Aesthetic Beauty,To kiss,To hold,Aware it's my own subconscious;Me, Myself, & I.
My hands are at times,As much dead skin,As living.Calluses & the white double growths,Of necrosis.It all makes sense,You see:We're ourselves ecosystems -Multicelled existences,Biotic cultures of tract, sinus, or jaw.Split.Divide.Mitosis.Meiosis.Back & forth,Until worms take the rest.
Evil Base Instincts.Same ones that got us,Brought us,Here.Malignant Covert Narcissists.Abusive Gaslighting Parents.Neglected Children.Neglected Youth.How couldn't we turn out wrong?What,Baba?You thought being the first to get degrees,Of bloodlines,Would matter?Monster Playing Dress Up.
Justice,I've learned over the decades,Is a word often repeated,But mostly in hollow tones.One sided interpretations,Subject to follies of a system.Or:Bias of those who interpret such disciplines.Underdog Riots.Anarchist Block Parties.Punk Mosh Faux Pas.Fuck thy "Justice."I've my own.
Today -Need take it slow.Bake Bread With Rosemary,Salt,Walk for hours in the sun.Acid reflux,Reminding me of my frail Humanity.Fatigue & twelve hour sleeps,Another lesson.Remaining Weak,Swollen,When The Monk Need Have Control.Self Care.My Own Brands Of Meditation,Opposite Of Normal.
Goodnight,Void.In changing genders;True androgyny.After singularity frees me from biology.Manufactured selves,Swapping around at will.Puppet two at once!Dissociative pasts,Where we piloted our own puppets of meat -Through trauma & abuse.Void?Promise me.If I can defeat mortality…Can -
Thing repeated to old pupils,As Mantra:"It's Never Too Late."Lax due dates,Preferring best work -Even day report card marks were due.Offer opportunity.Redemption.Experiences For Growth.Gifting nothing but good faith,& benefit of doubt.Traits shared.My old man;Their origin.Protege,Eh?